Green Lantern

My son wanted to see Green Lantern, so he and I saw it last night.

Green Lantern

His verdict?  “They showed all the best parts in the trailer.”

My verdict?  “They showed all the best parts in the trailer.”

Overall, I was disappointed, although all the green glowing bits were pretty, and the villain’s smoky tentacles were cool as they snaked their way through the city.

But oh my the plot holes.  An alien called Parallax is sucking fear out of people, which leaves them dessicated and boneless, I presume.  One purple-skinned Green Lantern called Abin Sur is mortally injured, so he commands his ring to find a worthy successor, which it does by grabbing Hal Jordan against his will and flying him across the coast.  Abin Sur tells Jordan that he has to take over, and Jordan hesitantly agrees, although all this seems rather compulsory.  Yet later in the movie several Green Lanterns are killed without the lengthy time necessary for their rings to find a replacement.  What happens to them?

Jordan is whisked away to another world called Oa, peopled by the other few thousand Green Lanterns (are they not supposed to be guarding their territories?  Why are they hanging around?) and some giant-heads called Guardians.  We know they are wise because all they do is frown at each other.  Jordan meets Sinestro, a sort of Green Lantern in command, who naturally doesn’t like the newbie, although isn’t that a slam against the ring’s choice?  It’s not like Jordan volunteered for this, remember.  Jordan then undergoes ‘training’ which consists of a bigger alien beating the stuffing out of him for two minutes.

Later comes the Bad Astronomy that will make astronomer Phil Plait cringe.  Jordan and Parallax fight for a bit in downtown Los Angeles, then take to outer space.  After a minute’s flight, they’re out by the asteroid belt, and just like in George Lucas’ movies, this asteroid belt is so thick with rocks you can’t see through it (unlike the real thing.)  Then after a bit of rock dodging, Green Lantern turns around, and there’s the sun, huge and bright, larger than if you were looking at it while standing on the surface of Mercury.  The alien is beaten easily, Sinestro realizes that he underestimated Hal Jordan, and he gets the girl, while telling her he’s giving up his day job to fight crime and stuff.

Overall, I give it two out of five.


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